A home that belongs to me

Look at this seat- brooded and treated by dust, grains of sand filling the incomplete parts of me. Hear the cackle- disintegrating where the walls stood by, contemplating the security under the auspices of the love, I besot.

Whenever winter comes, a wave caresses the skin, piercing the base and snatching the moisture I ever believed to have. Everything looks dry and when I ply energies to touch what I have lost; I am kaput.

Look at the huge sky with patches of cloud but where I stand goes the blink of an eye that sees only brown and then quality to recognize and to decipher loses the war I fought.

That all happened, that was meant to happen. Flowers we seeded had to knock down. Love that we nurtured had to belt down. No matter how much you live in, how much energy you invest, it happens leaving you dumbstruck. If time corresponded, I will sit by the town waiting for that quail to sing again, waiting for the season to chirk up again; I will slowly move towards it; to understand the hidden message it gives for the next winter.

For when winter comes again I will never let it barren, the inside world I have, and emotions that dominate my world. I will fight till my hand can bear the strand and after that I would let world go still, take away my senses, keep me stranded. To wait for next spring to come, next hope to bloom, and next home to make my own. For the place I belong to, is build with love and love comes after every stint and it comes better and stronger.

I knew world is round still I hooked by the corner!

(trotted my steps were, stumbled i walk. i knew you will hold ,if things fall apart)

As I pass by the road on the company’s vehicle; I hardly get my mind empty, like a view on the water side when the tire ruthlessly moved over, drenching into it and throwing splashes in the closer vicinity.

Like a reflection that I see from the window of the cars in canal, showing off light, dazzling and the noise, hustle bustle, which moved the periphery I am in. Then the smoke: you call it pollution but it almost  happened to smoke away many beautiful, neck wrenching,smirky, glittery memories rite now that i happened to spend with you .

I reached home that day with the heavy heart because I saw my life time on the voyage while the cars crossed by and that too in a reflection over the water, interesting it was!

People ask for reason of your quietness, of your going into a numb state, for a moment I thought; one enjoys solitude when nothing else in this world is there to give any extra thought, to bog you down, when you feel yourself in you, your hand in your own hand, you are speaking to yourself, when you are in hassle to relive so many voices that are pounding in your head and funny isn’t it that people call it your quietness in such dissonance.

I declare it a common phenomenon: so if you do this to me, I will do this to you too. Still I like the way you ask ‘why you are quiet’!

Its funny how things are connected I was enjoying my reminisce and I get to hear something relevant to it, ahh! Reason, Season and Life Time ; how these creatures, these mere mortal , simple soil fixture write things that are so heartfelt.This is how I find and inkling that god’s planning is pretty stronger then the little things I try colligating to extract out meanings of like ‘why this happens to me, why am I so unlucky, why I am so happy, why he/she enjoyed, why I reprieve. So on and so forth, well I believe in nature and its planning, so when you back bite me,I ignore because it never mattered or more precisely I didn’t care , when you hit me I won’t forgive and hit you back and then ask for forgiveness---God! I was hurt badly I swear upon you! , you reprimand me on the things that I call my principles; I will forgive you after a minute of when I lose temper! You left me in darkest of period, I forgive you because without it wasn’t possible to raise up so strongly to catch up with the world, to know my energies.I hold nothing against you because I developed this sense to forget things that can pinch my beautiful lifetime.

Anyhow being in myself reminded me of so many reasons to smile, seasons of joy, my lifetime memories.
People who matter, they matter, funny it is, you mattered to me I never knew this till you were with me, it happened the day we plan to carve up.

I hold nothing against you, just loving memories, my little prayers, a hope to slowly but surely meet you again somewhere and to make you my lifetime memoir my friend!