~I have a feeling that tonight gonna be a good night ~

Err… at some good instant today I tried signing in to my blogger’s profile and rush towards latest posts i could read and came across a blogger friend’s post which made me feel a little more embarrassed.
Btw my weekend starts today and I realized today was the last working day of my 2011 and we are entering into 2012. Anyways coming back to the post; it was second tag post asking me to write something about myself. I also realized how reserve I am when it comes to sharing something about me. I was quite strict with my rules initially and when ultimately I had to settle with the society with more people I never saw before; those things in me got jumbled up. In effort to keep myself on track I did hit and hurt myself many a times. Well mishi not writing about the post literally marks two more things in me 1) I was struggling with a lot of things now a days 2) I am lazy 3) There are some self imposed things on me which makes me feel miserable at times :P .

In short I have grown up to be a very sensitive person and also little things have started hurting me more than I used to or maybe I am finding myself in these hinges too. I have started feeling responsible of a lot of things at home and at office or with friends which necessarily shouldn’t be taken that serious and can be dealt as the time comes.

So without any waste of time I am going to answer questions associated with this tag post. I hope my excuses sound powerful enough.

1-*Mention at-least 5 good things that happened with you this year.

Hmm good things tough question.

- We shifted to a new place; I will call it a good thing.

- I was promoted to a senior level position.

- I am by the real grace of Allah getting things that I planned.

- I drove and drove and driving means a stabilizer of mind and body no?

- I got to know my family more and with every passing day I drew closer to them =))

Really I had to write a lot of things but those things couldn’t be carried by these five points. In short my spiritual relation with god kept on following sine wave but his relation with me stayed constant. I have more and more love for him then the love I grew up keeping for him in my heart =))

   2-*At-least 5 things that you desperately want to do next year.

hmmm that’s a good one but it’s not about the year; it something that I keep on planning but I do hope I get some more courage to deal with myself first

-      I want to buy a car; my personal car. With this hope that this change is going to free me with chain of dependency I had. I wish so.

-      I want to control my sensitivity; if I see someone having an accident early morning on road and his forehead bleeding …I need to move forward hoping that there are a lot of miseries and you can’t put yourself down like that .Need to control those eyes that ultimate gave a tunnel to clearly see what is running in heart. Need to be strong. Very strong.

-      Want at least two of my siblings getting married this year. Really Really Really!!!!! I hope you are able to see intensity

-      Want to be of some help for my family especially my mother. I love her.

-      Want to be a bit more decisive about my career. This year should make me more better at what I am doing or simply quit IT industry and work out on my weight ; my dresses freshness health diet :P not that I am planning to be a house wife in 2012 lol

3-*At-least 5 things that you want to avoid next year.

Hmm 5 things I want to avoid

-      Avoid people who cannot deal with me and my nature. Believe me people would never change their selves but would like you to change for them. Excuse them and ask them to spare you. Deal with them with your chin up.

-      Avoid eating junk food and focus on healthy food (LOL) ;)

-      Avoid being lazy and show up every day YES!

-      Avoid laziness again and be regular in my prayers and building up a healthy relation with my lord.

-      Avoid being over sensitive.

-      Avoid getting sick. 2011 from March I am suffering from enormous problems, I am glad I am better now. Just imagine I utilized whole outpatient facility on me. Hmmm

Phew!!! I am done yayyyy. I really wanted to write something at the end; a poem perhaps but I am not in my full groove at the moment.Thank you blogger friends for being with me thorough every thick and thin. At least I am sure you would hardly harm me. And then I would like to meet you one day so whosever comes to Pakistan and Lahore please post it down on your blogs and maybe we can share our experiences that way =))

Take care

Have a very happy weekend =)

O by the way I have been listening to this song whole day:

Khwab adhoray sahi ;khwab saharay tu hein
dreams may never be accomplished but they are our support

'You' And 'I' in this beautiful world

Tring! Tring! Another morning, I hoop myself in blanket and move up a bit, rubbing my eyes and my firm and square developed habit of looking at time; my mobile, begging this god forsaken clock for few more minutes hoping that everything will halt for a moment to observe my short lived sleep and then promise! I will wake up active, up and running.     
 

On the other side is my niece asking for something and I feign by every meaning telling her that I can’t speak right now and messaging her supersonic .I am unwell and was looking for some sleep but nah!

This mobile addiction : I saw plenty of messages asking for forgiveness and my eyes popping out a bit more(I liked the idea if people can forgive us that way,take a stamp and keep it for the day of judgment), some are wishing me 2011 and few stanzas describing and declaring 2010  as something bright and propitious. With my nephews reminding on even a sunny day about a rainy day quoting ‘happy raining season’ which actually made me move a bit to see outside the window, if it was actually raining? but sun showed up; by keenly throwing some of the rays on my face and made me bent my eyes Ya! Ya! You have power, happy!? And sternly the curtains closed.So I sent him an angry smiley asking him where the rain is? And he promptly replying that 'yesterday it was!'

Believe it or not, these events make me somewhat excited as well, there is a big wooden clock on the huge wall and everybody, repeat it silently and you will realize the intensity; everybody is gazing at that clock, this image is knitted by my mind so don’t confuse it with the London’s city …

Minutes hand moves slowly and steadily ahead, silence surrounds and clock tickles, making us move closer, one by one people adding up the crowd: and …and the three hands meet at common juncture its 12 :00:00 , unknown yelling,shouting out loud, some are interfering voices, few breaking the rhythm, we somehow stepped into the new world together.

We have had our hands completely ringed and locked, hoping that we will see this new day together, secretly praying never to let go of this hand, closing this chapter of bickering, may be for some, eliminating distress, increasing the patience and tolerance for each other, this time no ripples come between you and me.Lets start loving each other again.

Hmmm! So much that I can’t carve out by words, as the last December rain that made me go numb and making me absolutely go maniac about it, I can’t get rid of those beautiful scenes and I don’t want to pollute them either, things that normally get old are sometimes get ridden off, as I would like to get rid of my old clothes and shoes but this! may be not …

This last night of 2010 we sat by the woods, fired up, smoking away all the glitches and happiness making us go high, we feel each other within the nibbles of wood, within the noise of fire.Your golden face glowing as if sun plies for a new twist .We both see at this beautiful amalgamation of noise and glowing charm where darkness surround, at least we have nothing else to pay heed to, just you and me and this center of attention, where the world lighting up in your afterglow.

We passed the night looking at it soothing down as the passion goes down after so much of glorification and exuberance, lets aggregate ourselves again, lets forgive the pain and forget the differences: as we saw the sun rising up together, as together we make so much better… let entwine our energies for once , let’s start living again.

My world of word would never come to an and and this page surely would, I wish you all a very happy and healthy year ahead =)

P.S. Kashmiri kids are really on a mild extremism side, my brother asked my little cousin to have a new year bash (while kidding) and he raised his eyebrow and declared to already have entered into his new year one month before. I agree with him but lets enjoy, for 'YOU' and  'I' make a beautiful world together. Not today! Just everyday!

*Allah bless us all*

Don't forget to change the date, I always miss it =S