Saturday, June 25, 2011

~ I Am In Love With Her Fairy Tales ~

Lying beneath the wide spread sky and watching all stars capturing glimpse of my life spent both with beauty and nostalgia bring about the distance that I travel between being with you and being alone.
If I was the morning sky, she brought freshness and all exertion of the day fell down my skin in dew drops that she used to flick my face with.
If I was the victim of suffocation in worldly matters; she was the cool breeze giving a perfect escape by muttering about things that I kept wondering in her presence; those imaginary areas we travelled together and almost flying in air with arms wide open taking all the serenity and silent presence of I-don’t-know what but it was there; something that belongs to her magical world only but surely.
It was then I tossed her a companionship of life and time beyond our comprehension and she tossed me back things that she whips with her smile and they melt glaciers and peace the exuberant rivers.
But time flips within the luck lines marked in our hand. Glaciers they do melt but not with the heat of affection but with pronouncing weaknesses we develop with the time. Life is at rest but not with the beauty of her fairy land talks but with the harsh realities of life that nip down our happiness with some ugly events.
I realized how quickly I came out of her colorful world; not only made myself a somber inside- outide contended man but also made her look quite fidget most of the time. It was then I thought her radiant smile has gone away and I blamed time and when clueless accused her of losing charms.
How quickly I wrapped up things half heartedly that ultimately resulted in arguments every second of the day. I started feeling tired and fell down asleep quite quickly because love withered or hid in the closet or lost in the humidity.
Suddenly I realized she is sitting beside me asking question in her typical docile style and with blinking big eyes. “Could you marry someone else, once I am not alive?”
I laughed --- I laughed because I was addicted to her fairy tales too. I realized what I was missing so I started telling her a real time story: “Listen! I know we went through a hard time. But remember all the good times we catered climbing up the hill. I may not remain the same but inside my heart there lives a space that knows your language well. Sometimes it is not as glittering as it should be. Sometimes it’s just not easily comprehendible but …”
I realized she wasn’t taking interest in my real time story and she was gazing with her big eyes even yet. I sat their motionless and to break the ultimate silence I said:
 “Imagine a world where a guy and a girl cross the land of beauty and joy together and something prick her foot quite badly and it started bleeding … Guy had to leave that place for a while to find best emergency remedy”.
She moved her hair a little from the forehead and smiled. A smile that is famous to bring charm back to the valley of tired looking people.
First morning ray removed the overwhelming darkness and then I realized, I passed this whole night dreaming with my eyes wide open, looking at starts knitting a fairy tale.
Lost love is here but my darling is away.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

~ Catharsis ~

My life is brought to a halt
And scattered is the breath …
I chase the empty sky to find the inner depth
And I have almost lost myself in this dying fret …
As empty darkness,
A secret never told,
As moment that I lost
A fight with myself,
And you are still my belief …
That halts … I aggrieved.
And now when I see world moving on …
A hope that fills the open pores; grown.
With the flick you drive me on
The only change I own …
I wish to be in winter landscape again
but it changes with every possible rain...
No matter how much you wish it to stay
It changes ... a wish in vain ...
And you are the reason I seek
In every possible tweak …
But now when life halts
It gives me reason to smile ...
A smile that completely hides
Darkness of the sullen nights ...

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Good Bye - -

She knocked the door quite sheepishly and the way she stepped in was another heart breaker. She is worried and precipitating in heat of summers. She sits quietly over the couch and rubbing her hand as if she recently submerged herself in water and moving up in curves to feel life within.  

Life is strange ; it is strange because it has got all flavors and we are the toughest nuts who yell into pieces and seep down the floor to cash one beautiful moment out of everything and it doesn’t always disappoint us, it comes out with something as novice as her first smile of the day when sun spreads the shines.

This time it is a different situation and all my senses corresponding with each other to tell me it’s OK! Its OK we will help you move no matter how dingy is the road. But I hardly learn t to trust them. In fact trust anyone.

She looked up to tell us that in few hours she will be leaving and just last catharsis… last regrets as she spoke about them lightly… so lightly that I at least couldn’t hear .Because whatever she said seemed so meaningless at that time.

Good bye is the toughest part of the whole conversation. It gets tougher when you see tears in their eyes. And I cursed the moment when tears were once termed as crocodile’s one. They come through the eyes when something pricks the heart and it gallops inside till your tears washes away the corrosion within.

I am in age to feel good bye, to say good bye. Dramatic as it may seem good bye leaves a last hope that we will meet again somewhere on the highway so randomly as if bushes spur the tree when rain comes over so uneven. But I can surely tell you; this verdict feigns. It leaves you hollow for countless days and then suddenly new passages unwind the way. Finally your senses help you get through it but good byes create a strange void; a gap that cannot be filled but only crossed.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

' A Short Story '

SHE: “It was a usual Friday; nothing was special about the day except the same PTV drama being played and all men running towards the same juncture to see. Sometimes it was difficult almost impossible to quench the thirst of being there where you father was, to see what they see from their eye with so much of interest. He also promised me a black and white television once his salary arrives. I counted days for that to sit together and see that special drama together.”
ME:  Why you were not allowed to go?
SHE: Possessiveness; people call it being overprotective but I knew what that was. To hide things from the world was my worth.
ME: so what you used to do all the time alone at home.
SHE: I used to sit under mango tree and watch his first shadow marked visible over the road. Then I would move towards our home and make a cup of tea to make him narrate the story for me again.
You and I in this beautiful world
marks the name of the rise as it shows ...

to be apart, a despicable dream
and live together worth you realm

lets cross the fire hands in our hands
and give this ride a saftey land....